Coworker to me: “Alright, it’s closing time. Go ahead and shut off the deli lights…”
Customer: “Hi, can you cut up these turkey legs for me? And I need some meat from the deli.”
[I cut the turkey legs and slice the deli meat.]
Me: “Anything else for you?”
Customer: “Can we have a half pound of the Boar’s Head domestic Swiss?”
Me: “Hmm. Well, we’ve got several Swiss cheeses by Boar’s Head. Here’s the Lacy Swiss, the Gold Label Swiss…I’m not sure which ones are the domestics.”
Customer: “No, it wasn’t any of those…Ask her.”
Me to coworker: “Do you know which Boar’s Head Swiss is the domestic Swiss?”
Coworker: “Hmm, do you mean imported Swiss?”
Customer: “Yes! The imported Swiss. That’s what we want.”
Me: “OK, the imported Swiss is the Gold Label Swiss that I have here.”
Customer: “Let me see it. No, that’s not it. This Swiss didn’t have any holes in it.”
Me: “Well, I think all Swiss cheese has holes in it…”
Customer: “Well, give me a taste of that. I don’t think that was it, though.”
[I cut her a sample.]
Customer: “Yep, that’s it. Half a pound, please.”


About meatcountermadness

I got a job working behind a meat counter. Some of the things I hear people say there are pretty good. Email me: meatcountermadness@gmail.com
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