Monthly Archives: August 2010

Customer: “I bought some of your fresh turkey wings, but when I got home I realized they were frozen.” Manager: “Well, they actually are frozen. We just call them ‘fresh turkey wings’.” Customer: “Why would you call them fresh if … Continue reading →

[Customer pulls a number.] Coworker: “54?…55?…56?…57?…58?…Sir, what number do you have?” Customer: “55.”

Coworker, holding up slice of lunch meat: “How’s this?” Customer lady: “No, I want it thicker.” Coworker: “How much thicker? Twice as thick?” Customer: “No, not twice as thick. Maybe once as thick?”

Older coworker, singly softly to himself: “If you like my hand then put a ring on it…ho ho ho…[long pause]…ho ho ho ho.”

Coworker #1: “Did anyone ever tell you that you have big nostrils?” Coworker #2: “I’m black. Of course I have big nostrils!”

Customer: “…and two of the chillapotee.”

Coworker: “When you’re slicing deli meat medium, what do you set the slicer on?” Me: “I put it on 2. Why?” Coworker: “This woman just asked me for medium slices, but every slice I showed her wasn’t thick enough. I … Continue reading →

Coworker who speaks English as a second language: “Did you hear, a bull jumped over the stadium?” Me: “Uh, no.” Him: “Yeah, four people injured.” Me: “Where?” Him: “In Spain. They’re crazy there. But I don’t care.”

Coworker: “I can eat bugs, I can eat bugs no problem. But when it comes to pig anus and stuff like that, no way.”

Customer lady, holding up obscure brand of barbecue sauce: “Is this the same kind they have at Farmer Jack?”